That worked with a slight modification. Below is what I used:
if ( Gender='F', (sum( total <Grade> [Avg Rt]) - sum([Avg Rt]))/(count(total<Grade> [Unique ID]) - count( total <Grade,Gender> [Unique ID])) , avg([Avg Rt]))
Unique ID was just another field I had but probably could have used any field in place for that count.
Your formula worked if there were an equal number of people by gender. I was able to get the counts of each gender so that the sum total was divided by the number of 'M' to get the average for the 'M'. This may have been taking a longer way than needed to solve the problem but it worked.
Thank you very much for your help! Greatly Appreciated!