Sort by Expression not working

[imsohotness]

Good morning everyone, 

I'm trying to use the Match function to custom sort text values in a certain field for my pie charts, but it doesn't work. Here is my expression: 

=Match([Item 3: Length of Service],'More than 5 years','3-5 years','1-2 years','Less than 1 year')

Here is a quick video explaining my issue. Sorry for the poor sound quality.

[imsohotness]

I've tried both, but the values refuse to sort. They won't budge.

Why is this so complicated??